If you haven't read the previous post on fellowship and hospitality...Go read that one first (link at the bottom) and then come back.
We have tried to start fellowshipping a little more in the last year or so and we have been so blessed by it. It’s definitely been a step "out of our comfort zone” but it’s been oh so good for us as a family and for Bill and I as a couple…
As I mentioned in the last post, a lot of times, we often limit ourselves in the area of fellowship/hospitality by a myriad of excuses. Here are a few “excuses” I want to especially highlight and provide some tips to hopefully refute those “pesky detractors.”
The “TOO TIGHT of a GROCERY BUDGET”EXCUSE
(Tips to "bust that excuse!”)
1) Serve soup and bread (or sandwiches—peanut butter sandwiches or grilled cheese sandwiches make a great side for soup). A homemade soup and some good bread can feed a crowd very affordably and provides a cozy opportunity to gather around the table and build connections over good food!
2) Host a potluck. Split the cost of a get together with your guests by each family contributing a dish. Not only is it thrifty, it's a casual and low stress crowd pleaser. Plus, it also gives each family a break from the same old, same old food. It provide a wonderful opportunity to experience new foods and find additional recipes to add to your own weekly meal plan.
3) Extend an evening invitation for snacks or dessert. Why not have friends over for after-dinner popcorn and board games? Or maybe just dessert and conversation? Or perhaps, just fix a few simple but yummy appetizers? Most of the people we invite into our homes have food in their own refrigerator. They crave personal connection and fellowship with others more than a elaborate meal that cost a fortune. A simple snack or a dessert is a completely valid option to host friends. Don’t allow your finances/lack of wiggle room in your grocery budget to be the reason you miss out on fun and fellowship with those you love.
4) Use what is on sale or in season. If you still want to host friends over for an actual meal, check the grocery ads before making your menu so that you can reap the benefits of local sale prices.
5) Serve simple foods your family would normally eat. Please don't feel like you always need to serve steaks, fancy sides, and individual chocolate lava cakes. Having friends over for your regular spaghetti or taco night won't add much to your grocery bill and will likely be thoroughly enjoyed by your guests.
6) Use what you have. Decorate the table with your own regular dishes and flowers from the yard or a vase full of twigs and pine cones, or don't feel like you have to decorate at all. You don't need to create a magazine-worthy table in order to bless your guests and be blessed by their friendship.
7) Stretch out those pricey ingredients. Sometimes when I'm doubling a recipe to share, I don't fully double some of the most expensive ingredients. Add a little less chicken and a couple more potatoes to that casserole, or top things with a little less cheese than usual. Sometimes, I even dilute the heavy cream with some milk when making cream based sauces and soups. Nobody will even know and your grocery dollar will stretch just a little bit further.
8) Order a few $5 Hot and Ready pizzas from Little Caesars (if you have one close by)-- Granted, they may not be the pizza of choice but they are decent in taste. Pizza goes a long way (especially if you ask them to cut pizza into squares) and is quick and easy --virtually no clean up at all.
"MY HOUSE ISN'T COMPANY READY" EXCUSE (Tips to "bust that excuse!)
This used to be me 100%! It wasn't that I didn't want to host people at my house. I actually enjoyed it but due to my own negligence, my house was nearly always in a state of controlled chaos. The thought of someone dropping by unexpectedly was something that would send me into a frenzy. To my shame, my husband once said, "if I want the house to get clean, I guess I should call someone and tell them to call/text you that they are on their way to our house. That will make you clean." Aggghhh.... but that was the truth then. I had no system in place to "maintain a clean house". I would clean the house from top to bottom and then just allow it to go right back to the same shape. It was a vicious cycle. I wanted to have an “open door policy” and be hospitable, but I didn't want my family and friends to see my messy, dirty house. So, I rarely hosted and when I did, it was a stressful, unhappy event in the days leading up to the actual occasion.
Finally, I had had enough. I wanted a change.
Here are some tips that revolutionized my life.
1) Declutter your space.
I watched several "decluttering" gurus online and I realized my mess had a lot to do with me having too much stuff to maintain in my home. It was virtually impossible to keep my home "company ready" with all the stuff I had everywhere. This was probably the single most important tip for me. (I highly recommend The Minimal Mom (blog, podcast, and youtube channel) for a resource to help you get started in the decluttering process)
2) Have a designated place (or "home) for everything in your space.
If everything has a specific spot where it belongs, it makes it so much easier to "put it away". Keeping the inventory (stuff) manageable ensures that your space isn't over crowded. If a drawer or a shelf is packed plumb full, it's much more of a temptation to just leave the item sitting out rather than to fight with it to get it back in its correct space. —Pare down your stuff to where it fits easily in the designated "container, bin or drawer" —
One lady's motto was: In order for a system to work, it must be just as easy to put it away and it is to leave it out. (Clutterbug is an amazing resource to help you get organized. (blog and youtube channel)
3) Remove / Revamp clutter prone zones.
Go outside and step back into your house looking as you would if you didn’t live there. Sometimes, we become oblivious to major cluttered areas in our home simply because we see it everyday. Think piles of shoes by the door or in the entryway…piles of mail on the counter, and the such… Look aound and see what areas of your house seem to be problematic. Remove that obvious clutter and institute a storage system (one that works for you) that will help you avoid those types of messes— for example, put all shoes in a basket instead of just leaving a massive pile or instead of allowing the mail to pile up on the end of your counter, have a little basket, tray, or folder to sort the important mail into as soon as it comes into the house. (Throw junk mail and non-important mail into the trash immediately to reduce paper clutter. )
This next one may be slightly controversial--a lot of decluttering gurus HATE random baskets and bins because they DO have a tendency to become catch-alls and fill up with junk. But depending on the season of life you are currently in, (with kids, I think it is a must) a quick "tidy up" bin/basket can be a wonderful tool to help you stay "company ready"
4) Keep a decent size basket/bin in the corner of your living room or main living space. This is a vital tool if you suddenly need your house to be "company ready" in a matter of minutes. All the toys, clutter, and whatnot can be tossed into the basket and covered with a throw blanket to make it appear to have a purpose (besides hiding the mess!) This was a game changer with little ones. Kids can wreck a living space in minutes lol! But having a "temporary home" within arm’s reach for those messes will definitely help you maintain a "company ready" home. (Just don't forget to put those things away after your company leaves--or it may be too full to utilized the next time you need it!)
5) Keep to a simple cleaning schedule.
This is vital to keep a "company ready" home. My friend Erica from a Simpler Life blog even gave some helpful tips on time management and multitasking (especially with kids) to keep you stick to this goal. (https://www.asimplerlife.net/post/work-while-you-wait) Take a second and do a quick wipe down of the sink and the toilet daily. Maintaining these areas daily will make the deep cleanings much easier and keep your bathrooms "company presentable" at least.
I also have got in the habit of vacuuming my kitchen rug daily due to crumbs and such. When I vacuum the rug, I also quickly run my vacuum over the entire kitchen floor to sweep up the majority of the crud. I still have to sweep and mop the tile frequently, but this small change alone has made a world of difference on helping keep my house "company ready". I also "sweep my way out" of the kitchen and give the living room a quick sweep as I go through the house.
Keeping the dishes done (I am blessed with a dishwasher) also had a huge impact on my kitchen being presentable. An empty and clean sink just gives the whole space a much more "company ready" appearance.
I also have started to keep my counters cleared off. I have very little sitting out on my surfaces. This makes it so much easier to maintain a "company presentable" look. I can quickly wipe down all the surfaces in my kitchen without it being fussy or complicated.
6) Focus on the main living spaces first.
This helped me a lot. By just focusing on the kitchen, living room, and guest bathroom first, I was able to keep a "company presentable" home. If your main living space is tidy, it helps motivate you to work on the more hidden areas of your home.
7) JUST RELAX!
Your closest friends and family aren't looking to criticize or critique your homemaking skills. Many of them struggle just like you do. They don't have it all together all the time either. They just LOVE you and want to spend quality time with you. Remember, People don't remember a fancy recipe or a beautifully coiffed house as much as they remember the people that cared about them and showed that love in word and deed. So, if you find yourself in a situation less than ideal, don't run around apologizing for the mess. Just do your best and let go of the rest.
Focus on people, not stuff...
Relationships are much more important than material things. Just make your guests feel welcome and that is what they will remember.
From my heart to yours,
-Tiphanie ❤️