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Writer's pictureTiphanie Sizemore—New Mercies

Helpful Cooking Tips for New Homemakers

If you are a new wife or bride-to-be, this post may be helpful for you!


Becoming a proficient at cooking doesn't have to be overwhelming...I know for me, though, cooking was, indeed, a challenge when I first got married. I knew how to cook very basic foods but when it came to planning and cooking dinner for my husband and I all the time, I soon realized that I had much to learn! Thankfully, my culinary skills have improved a lot over the years. With much practice (trial/errors), and with the Lord’s help, I have become a decent enough cook.

1. Try to stick to easy, simple recipes at first,


Unless you are already proficient in the kitchen before marriage, you may want to try to stick to easy, simple recipes at first, until you develop more confidence in your cooking abilities.

In the beginning, I had big illusions of how I was going to make this dish and I was going to make that recipe as a new wife. Unfortunately, due to my lack of culinary knowledge, I often picked and attempted recipes that were outside the scope of my “beginner” skill level. I remember the first time I tried to make breakfast gravy. 🤦🏼‍♀️ It was a disaster!! My mom had made homemade gravy all the time while I was growing up and I had watched her make it time and time again. I thought this should be easy! I’ve watched Mom make that hundreds of times! I can do this! Unfortunately, I didn’t realize there was a lot more to it than it appeared. My mom had had many years of experience making gravy to get it “just right”. So when I tried making it myself, it ended up resembling like something closer to wallpaper paste than gravy!! I remember that feeling of failure when I couldn’t get my gravy to get thinner and creamier... It just kept getting thicker and thicker, no matter what I tried!! So frustrated with my inability to make the gravy right and now facing the ruins of our dinner, I started crying...but my dear, sweet, new husband said “well, it tastes okay.” (even if he had to literally cut it with a fork!) He ate it like a champ! Bless his heart, he extended compassion and grace to me in that moment... He assured me that it was okay— that I would learn how to get the gravy consistency right with some practice. It’s humorous now and we laugh about that moment, but his response made a world of difference to me! Yes, I was still upset that my gravy had not turned out right but his reaction assured me that it’s alright to mess up! It is okay not to be able to do everything right the first time!!

2. Practice makes perfect...


Later, when I talk to my mom, and relayed to her what happened, she said I had probably added either too much flour or had the heat up too high. So, I didn’t let one failure (or two or three!😉) stop me from trying again. Biscuits and gravy was a food that I discovered my new husband loved and I was determined to learn how to make it. I learned not to quit trying—The more I practiced, the better I became at judging the browning flour, knowing how much milk to add, etc... ( Now with all that practice, I can make a “mean” sausage gravy!! )


3. Failures can be valuable learning experiences!!


Some things I realized are best taught by experience. You can follow a recipe to “T” but sometimes you need some tangible skills to execute that recipe that can only be gained by experience— so don’t quit trying if you mess up the first time!! You will get it !! Always remember, failures are sometimes actually valuable learning experiences!!

4. Don’t take your failures personal. Let them roll off your back!

Ever heard the phrase, “she burnt the biscuits!” —this is a common occurrence that has happened to all of us at least once in our cooking experience. The main reason why this happens usually is because we are trying to do multiple things at once and we forget that there are biscuits in the oven... (it has even happened to seasoned cooks who got busy preparing other dishes ) so if you ever find yourself crying over “burnt biscuits” lol 😂 give yourself some grace— You are not alone! Everyone burns the biscuits at one time or another...it’s not the end of the world!! Don’t take it personally if your husband says anything, just try to laugh it off, “better luck next time”, and toast a couple pieces of bread for dinner instead if necessary!!


Like I have said time and time before (I can’t reiterate it enough!!) ... if we truly desire to please God and want to bless our husband/home with our homemaking, we must be willing to learn!! We must have tender, teachable spirits!! Our attitudes must be Godly!! Just because you mess up or fail at something the first time, don’t allow the Devil to use that as an opportunity “to gain place” in your home. I know what I am talking about. I have been there. Something goes wrong or doesn't go as you planned, then your husband says something about it that just hits you the wrong way, and before you know it, you give into having a bad attitude and you shoot back a caustic remark (or even thoughts!! ) and then the situation escalates to where the Devil begins to “move in”....


I can testify that having a bad attitude doesn’t get you anything except for contention, arguments, and unhappiness! Don’t fall into those traps of the enemy! It isn’t worth it!! Don’t allow your mindset to shift your thinking from Godly, Holy thinking. Don’t put up a vacancy sign in your heart for the Devil see and take up residence in your home!

It is so much better to keep a good attitude and a happy heart, to be teachable, to learn more, and to become a “better you”!!


(I thought the image above (w/ two heads discussing mindset ) illustrated beautiful what I was trying to convey!!

 
If I had never made mistakes while cooking, I would have never felt comfortable offering cooking advice. Quite honestly, the recipes I have shared thus far have been “perfected” through many trials and errors. When we cook or bake a recipe that doesn’t turn out the way we had planned one of two things typically happens: either we have a learning experience for the next time and have a good laugh, or we discover something new about the recipe that adds some flare to it. Just think, if there was never a mistake while cooking the following foods would not be in existence: Potato Chips (were intended to be thin scalloped potatoes), Cream Cheese (William Lawrence of NY didn’t follow his recipe for Neufchatel), and hold on to your socks….the beloved Chocolate Chip Cookies (Ruth Wakefield of Toll House Inn RAN OUT of baking chocolate and chopped up a chocolate bar instead and placed it into her cookies) Proof enough that our “mistakes” can turn out to be blessings? If the thought of cooking makes you anxious because of bad past experiences…please know, I have been there…we ALL fall short from time to time!! —Janelle Nehrenz

 

5. Don’t rush your meal!!

One of the biggest tips that I could give any beginning cook is to not rush your cooking — cook on lower temperatures for longer times, if necessary. Often, most disasters in the kitchen happen because of being rushed or having too many things going at once. Sometimes, if you have multiple things going, it is easier to stagger them so all are not requiring your attention all at once. There are many ways to do this— the crockpot, the Instapot, the air fryer oven, or even your regular conventional oven can help you keep ‘already done’ items warm while you work on other parts of your meal. I have found being able to take my time and work at my own pace greatly increased my success in the kitchen.

6. Do any prep work early!!

Don’t wait until the last minute to try to prep your food and get everything ready for dinner. If you know there is a lot of food prep that can be in advance (cutting/trimming/seasoning meat, cutting veggies, making a casserole, etc) do it earlier in the day and stick it back in the fridge. The vast majority of the time, there are multiple ways to prepare early. Pre-Prepping frees up a lot of time and gives you a foundation for success...



7. Buy a meat thermometer!! Seriously!!

Another valuable tip is buy a meat thermometer!! In some of my first meals, my meat was not thoroughly cooked. The outside of my meat was beautiful and golden brown but the inside wasn’t even done! This caused me to be super cautious about thoroughly cooking my meats for a long time...As a result, for years, my meats were always tough and dry, no matter what recipe I made. Now, I realize that my dry, tough meat was because I was grossly overcooking it! 🤷🏼‍♀️ A few years back, my brother and I was talking one day, I mentioned my problem with dry, tough meat, he recommended that I get a meat thermometer....I took his advice and wow! That has been a total game changer!! I now cook juicy, tender meats for dinner. It is amazing!!

In fact, my husband will often tell the kids that he would rather eat at “Mommy’s Kitchen” than a restaurant...Wow! That’s high praise for a lady that couldn’t make gravy or constantly undercooked/overcooked her meats before!! Miracles do happen!! 😱😱😱


But see?? If I can do it, I am confident anyone can!!


With the Lord’s help, and some helpful teaching/instruction, cooking can be fun and rewarding!! There is something so satisfying about making a big delicious family meal and sharing the fruits of your labor with those you love —

In fact, my mom and I were just talking about this concept the other day. She was talking about how contented and satisfied she feels on Thanksgiving/holidays ( as a wife/mom/Gramma/homemaker) when the whole family comes over (and there is a houseful of people!) and she cooks/serves a thanksgiving/holiday spread for us. Yes, it is hard work. Yes, by the end of the day, she is exhausted but she said that knowing that her sacrifice of love to feed and “serve” her family enabled everyone have a wonderful day of fun, food, family, and fellowship is reward enough for her!! She said that has been some of her happiest, most fulfilled times— as she cleaned up the mess and looked around at all the blessings God has bestowed in her life!!


So let’s make a conscious decision today to allow our cooking be a act of love and service to God and our families instead of a dreaded chore that we approach with drudgery that we just HAVE to do ....


We will richly reap the rewards of this “transformed” mindset!!!

-Tiphanie ❤️




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